Ouija (D+ or 1.5/4 stars)
O-U-I-J-A. We've all played the Hasbro board game. And now we have an October horror movie based on said game, 'Ouija' (directed by Stiles White). Is it any good? Ummmmmmmm, no. The plot revolves around teens Laine (England's Olivia Cooke, a could-be-twin of, say, Jessica Alba or Rose Byrne) & Debbie (Shelley Hennig), BFFs since childhood. But Debbie has been acting strange lately and, since one of the rules about using the Ouija board is that no one should play alone, Laine is dismayed to learn that that's exactly what Debbie was doing when she hung herself in her house using a string of Christmas lights.
Driven to investigate this gruesome death & discover exactly what happened, grieving Laine enlists help from her younger sister, Sarah (Ana Coto), her boyfriend, Trevor (Daren Kagasoff), & 2 pals (Douglas Smith, Bianca Santos) for a sort of seance using the antique Ouija board that Debbie found in her very own attic. Surrrrre enough, they make contact with the same malicious spirit(s) who dispatched Debbie. Furthermore, Laine tracks down a former resident of Debbie's home, Paulina (Lin Shaye, veteran of many a horror flick. i.e., Insidious), now confined to a wheelchair in an asylum ... shocker. Matters go from bad to worse when Debbie's other friends start dying and, it's all up to Laine to figure out the mystery of the Ouija board, find clues to its past, & try to avert further deaths.
Co-produced by Michael Bay {ugh}, this flick offers alllll the textbook scares that I was expecting: jump shocks, sudden bursts of noise, stoves that light themselves, ghosts rushing toward the camera with their mouths open in fast edits, even mysterious figures standing & facing a wall {why hello there, Blair Witch}. Some of that stuff is pretty effective. I saw this film with pals Kevin, Tricia, & Erin and, Erin & I had a grand old time clutching each other, flipping out in our seats, & laughing while being terrified. Having said that, if I saw this alone in the comfort of my own home, I don't think the scares would have been AS effective or AS scary.
All this said, the scares, chills, & thrills don't add up to anything effective because the actual story, cardboard characters, & lines of dialogue are so horrendous. Olivia Cooke comes off best as Laine in that ... it seems like she's actually giving a sh*t, haha. She actually shows some acting chops. The rest of the teen actors are fairly wooden; worst being Daren Kagasoff (though, that's mostly because he's given almost nothing to do), & Douglas Smith, who is SO bad that I can't even find words to describe his 'performance'. Additionally, these characters' behaviors make little sense in real life. i.e., WHY does Trevor ride his bike (and then walk it) through a creepy dark tunnel alone; and WHY would Laine & co. not go running & screaming from a house after a ghost made itself known? Ugh. SO stupid.
'Ouija' is bad. The plot is beyond formulaic. And midway through, it stopped being intriguing or scary because I was constantly rolling my eyes in disappointment. Only Olivia Cooke, a unique bathroom sink killing, and good 'ole Lin Shaye (as the lady in the asylum) offer up any spark. I enjoyed seeing this with my friends but, that's as far as my enjoyment went. 'Ouija' fails to give the enigmatic board game an explicable use in this cinematic form. I'm sure the possibilities are there to create an entertaining, worthwhile horror flick about the mysterious Ouija game, but you ain't gonna find it here. Boo -- and I don't mean that in the ghost sense.
Driven to investigate this gruesome death & discover exactly what happened, grieving Laine enlists help from her younger sister, Sarah (Ana Coto), her boyfriend, Trevor (Daren Kagasoff), & 2 pals (Douglas Smith, Bianca Santos) for a sort of seance using the antique Ouija board that Debbie found in her very own attic. Surrrrre enough, they make contact with the same malicious spirit(s) who dispatched Debbie. Furthermore, Laine tracks down a former resident of Debbie's home, Paulina (Lin Shaye, veteran of many a horror flick. i.e., Insidious), now confined to a wheelchair in an asylum ... shocker. Matters go from bad to worse when Debbie's other friends start dying and, it's all up to Laine to figure out the mystery of the Ouija board, find clues to its past, & try to avert further deaths.
Co-produced by Michael Bay {ugh}, this flick offers alllll the textbook scares that I was expecting: jump shocks, sudden bursts of noise, stoves that light themselves, ghosts rushing toward the camera with their mouths open in fast edits, even mysterious figures standing & facing a wall {why hello there, Blair Witch}. Some of that stuff is pretty effective. I saw this film with pals Kevin, Tricia, & Erin and, Erin & I had a grand old time clutching each other, flipping out in our seats, & laughing while being terrified. Having said that, if I saw this alone in the comfort of my own home, I don't think the scares would have been AS effective or AS scary.
All this said, the scares, chills, & thrills don't add up to anything effective because the actual story, cardboard characters, & lines of dialogue are so horrendous. Olivia Cooke comes off best as Laine in that ... it seems like she's actually giving a sh*t, haha. She actually shows some acting chops. The rest of the teen actors are fairly wooden; worst being Daren Kagasoff (though, that's mostly because he's given almost nothing to do), & Douglas Smith, who is SO bad that I can't even find words to describe his 'performance'. Additionally, these characters' behaviors make little sense in real life. i.e., WHY does Trevor ride his bike (and then walk it) through a creepy dark tunnel alone; and WHY would Laine & co. not go running & screaming from a house after a ghost made itself known? Ugh. SO stupid.
'Ouija' is bad. The plot is beyond formulaic. And midway through, it stopped being intriguing or scary because I was constantly rolling my eyes in disappointment. Only Olivia Cooke, a unique bathroom sink killing, and good 'ole Lin Shaye (as the lady in the asylum) offer up any spark. I enjoyed seeing this with my friends but, that's as far as my enjoyment went. 'Ouija' fails to give the enigmatic board game an explicable use in this cinematic form. I'm sure the possibilities are there to create an entertaining, worthwhile horror flick about the mysterious Ouija game, but you ain't gonna find it here. Boo -- and I don't mean that in the ghost sense.