Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (D or 1/4 stars)
Good God. What has happened to romantic comedies? Since when have they started becoming BOTH unromantic and unfunny? Obviously, I infer that 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past', directed by Mark Waters, is one of these misfires. Connor Mead (Matthew McConaughey) is a famous photographer who has a bad boy reputation for loving women & leaving 'em; just when they think he'll fall in love. Celebrities, models, the girl next door ... all women flock to him for sex; only to be disappointed that he doesn't stay 'afterwards'. Forget cuddling, spooning, or lying in bed til noon. He's out the door well before the alarm buzzer goes off. His brother (Breckin Meyer) is about to get married, & Connor thinks this is awful; not only because his wife (Lacey Chabert) is your classic Bridezilla, but because he holds a strong opposition to the institution of marriage.
Also a member of the wedding party is a girl from Connor's past - Jenny (Jennifer Garner), the one who got away; the one who Connor once thought 'could' have been the 'one' if he had the balls to commit. Seeing each other again after a long time, all they can do is take jabs at each other. But Connor will soon be in for a rude awakening (pun intended). The night before the wedding, he is visited by 4 ghosts who take him through his past, present, & future (you see where this ties in to Dickens' A Christmas Carol). The 1st ghost is his Uncle Wayne (Michael Douglas), Connor's former idol in womanizing. He' appears to prepare Connor for what is to come. The 2nd ghost is also from his past: a homely girl he lost his virginity to (the always funny Emma Stone). She takes Connor back to a time when he had small, burgeoning feeling for Jenny; as they chit-chat on a swing set & almost kiss.
It's not long after this sweet moment, though, when we start to see how he came to be a womanizing as*hole. The 3rd ghost (from his present) is a lowly co-worker (Noureen DeWulf) who lets Connor see that he is not all that he's cracked up to be. And the 4th ghost (from the future) is a gorgeous blonde woman (Olga Maliouk) who quietly floats about; showing Connor how his ugly ways will lead to misery (Jenny eventually marrying a rival guy). Is there time for him to change? Can he ever become a sensitive, caring person? If it's to happen, he must abandon his Rico Syave ways & hone in on the right woman.
The premise behind 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past' is kinda cool; taking a rom-com & infuse it with a popular classic from the Dickensian era. But the execution of that premise is pretty bad; never rising above cliche, formula, or gimmickry. And truth be told, after the first half hour of this, I thought we were heading for a big Zero rating; that's how much I was loathing everything I was seeing. But let's not focus on the negatives for now. Here's what I ... liked? I enjoyed Emma Stone for her physical performance & lively one-liners. I liked how much fun Michael Douglas seemed to be having in the 'smarmy' role; knowing what an awful movie he's in. His dialogue (and line delivery) was needed. I liked the tender moments in the film (though they are very few & very far between). It's hard to dislike Jennifer Garner in anything. The movie stinks, but she doesn't. And the film ends well. I genuinely liked it; and the character arc Connor goes through.
But any praising now comes to a screeching halt. Nothing about the movie breaks new ground. We've seen this type of movie a thousand times. There's barely any life in it. The film is photographed poorly; it's not easy to make most of these good looking actors/actresses look unwell. The chemistry btwn. McConaughey & Garner is not really there. It was very weird to see the women in this film utilized as stupid, disposable sex partners. I can't imagine many women enjoying the nasty, repulsive, primitive behavior on display from both the narrow-minded Connor AND his women. No one is like that in real life; no one. McConaughey, himself, is a problem, as well. His Connor is an over-confident, creepy sleazeball; making it hard to root for his predictable redemption. McConaughey is getting older, & has used the rom-com genre as a crutch for far too long. Someone else is going to come up & eclipse him very soon. Ultimately, it all comes back to what I wrote in the 1st paragraph. Despite the nice ending, I only chuckled at 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past' once or twice, & I was never emotionally moved. Fail.
Also a member of the wedding party is a girl from Connor's past - Jenny (Jennifer Garner), the one who got away; the one who Connor once thought 'could' have been the 'one' if he had the balls to commit. Seeing each other again after a long time, all they can do is take jabs at each other. But Connor will soon be in for a rude awakening (pun intended). The night before the wedding, he is visited by 4 ghosts who take him through his past, present, & future (you see where this ties in to Dickens' A Christmas Carol). The 1st ghost is his Uncle Wayne (Michael Douglas), Connor's former idol in womanizing. He' appears to prepare Connor for what is to come. The 2nd ghost is also from his past: a homely girl he lost his virginity to (the always funny Emma Stone). She takes Connor back to a time when he had small, burgeoning feeling for Jenny; as they chit-chat on a swing set & almost kiss.
It's not long after this sweet moment, though, when we start to see how he came to be a womanizing as*hole. The 3rd ghost (from his present) is a lowly co-worker (Noureen DeWulf) who lets Connor see that he is not all that he's cracked up to be. And the 4th ghost (from the future) is a gorgeous blonde woman (Olga Maliouk) who quietly floats about; showing Connor how his ugly ways will lead to misery (Jenny eventually marrying a rival guy). Is there time for him to change? Can he ever become a sensitive, caring person? If it's to happen, he must abandon his Rico Syave ways & hone in on the right woman.
The premise behind 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past' is kinda cool; taking a rom-com & infuse it with a popular classic from the Dickensian era. But the execution of that premise is pretty bad; never rising above cliche, formula, or gimmickry. And truth be told, after the first half hour of this, I thought we were heading for a big Zero rating; that's how much I was loathing everything I was seeing. But let's not focus on the negatives for now. Here's what I ... liked? I enjoyed Emma Stone for her physical performance & lively one-liners. I liked how much fun Michael Douglas seemed to be having in the 'smarmy' role; knowing what an awful movie he's in. His dialogue (and line delivery) was needed. I liked the tender moments in the film (though they are very few & very far between). It's hard to dislike Jennifer Garner in anything. The movie stinks, but she doesn't. And the film ends well. I genuinely liked it; and the character arc Connor goes through.
But any praising now comes to a screeching halt. Nothing about the movie breaks new ground. We've seen this type of movie a thousand times. There's barely any life in it. The film is photographed poorly; it's not easy to make most of these good looking actors/actresses look unwell. The chemistry btwn. McConaughey & Garner is not really there. It was very weird to see the women in this film utilized as stupid, disposable sex partners. I can't imagine many women enjoying the nasty, repulsive, primitive behavior on display from both the narrow-minded Connor AND his women. No one is like that in real life; no one. McConaughey, himself, is a problem, as well. His Connor is an over-confident, creepy sleazeball; making it hard to root for his predictable redemption. McConaughey is getting older, & has used the rom-com genre as a crutch for far too long. Someone else is going to come up & eclipse him very soon. Ultimately, it all comes back to what I wrote in the 1st paragraph. Despite the nice ending, I only chuckled at 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past' once or twice, & I was never emotionally moved. Fail.